*Mr Malevolent and I*

Ok so I will talk to you about my Fail Life. Life is Fail (well, at least mine is). Life is even an anagram of fail! That's how fail it is. Rearrnge the letters in FAIL and you get LIFA... oh wait... close enough.

There is a guy like God, except he is not God. God is described in the bible as benevolent, kind, caring, loving - positive words. This guy controlling my life, who I shall call Mr. Malevolent is not God at all. He does not resemble God in the slightest. He is malicious and evil. He purposely makes my life suck.

I can just imagine how my life could be so good. Why can't everything just work out? That's what I wondered once but now I know. I'll tell you why everything can't 'just work out': It is because Mr Malevolent is a f***. He does not like people being happy.

Other people have God guiding them, they lead good, cheerful lives. Some people do not believe in God, but Mr Malevolent does not set his eye on them either, so they live average lives. Then there is the third type of life, where I belong. This third type of life is guided by Mr Malevolent and thus are destined for failure. Now, just to make sure you are clear on this I will use a metaphor:

Imagine a man driving a bus and you are on that bus. Now, there are three buses like that. The first bus is driven by God. Ahhh, look how he drives on the highway next to a cliff! Look how how avoids the obstacles, clearly driving like a good consciencious citizen! His passengers are safe!

Now the second bus, has no driver! But it is on a highway, moving straight. This highway is straight, so this bus is not falling off. Though the passengers in this bus are having a very bumpy ride, as they have no driver and the bus is just running over the obstacles, it is at least decently safe.

I am on the third bus. This bus is driven by Mr Malevolent. What he is doing resembles that of a Iraqi terrorist. He is driving the bus - driving it right off the cliff. Safe and this third bus are antonyms of each other. If you are on this third bus, you are not safe. If you are safe, you are not on this third bus.

Hopefully, you understand my life. It spells 'FAIL'. Now, I do not know why Mr Malevolent chose me to be in his FAIL bus. Perhaps he thought it would be intersting. Perhaps, God, Mr Malevolent and Mr I-Do-Not-Exist rollin dice and I just happened to be unlucky and Mr Malevolent rolled a 6 and won me - not cool.

However, I have not lost in this game of life. Mr Malevolent has not defeated me yet. I still have one more weapon - Hope. Some people (points to the person of name whose name I shall not name) do not believe in hope and think it is a piece of crap. I tell you, person whose name I shall not name, Hope does exist and it is not crap. Even if there is a low chance of something happening, if you have hope, if you have faith, it will happen. Nothing is 100%.

Have a time guys ^^ Hope you liked my representation of my dull, screwed up life XD